CredoJune 4, 2007
We’re currently caught in the summer doldrums of weather and sports in Houston. The Astros are staggering through late May and June like a gazelle on the Discovery channel just before the cheetah goes into Super Pursuit Mode, and the daily downpours are a constant reminder that this part of the country is truly sub-tropical. For reasons that will become apparent with time, I hope to encapsulate here what it means to be a Houston sports fan in a city where the losses and heartbreak can be as stifling and soul-crushing as the humidity. It’s not all doom and gloom, but it is what it is.
I believe in the Astros, the Rockets, the Dynamo, and the Texans. In that order.
I believe in Mike Scott, Luke Scott, and Scotty Brooks.
I believe in the Dream, The Ryan Express, and the Tyler Rose.
I believe that J.R. Richard’s stroke was the worst thing that ever happened to a Houston team.
I believe that Jeff Van Gundy is an accountant in his spare time. And Rudy T trains prizefighters.
I believe that Jose Cruz could hear me yelling to him from the Rainbow seats at the Astrodome.
I believe Hakeem’s car wash is overpriced.
I believe that David Carr would only have succeeded if he’d played for the Patriots. And his name was Tom Brady.
I believe that Yao Ming is a wimp. When you’re 7’6″, your primary offensive weapon should not be a fall-away jumper.
I believe that Mark Loretta should start more often than Craig Biggio.
I believe that emulating Jeff Bagwell’s batting stance made me a better hitter in my first year of kid’s pitch.
I believe that Kevin Bass should be forgiven.
I believe that Tracy McGrady is the illegitmate son of Sleepy Floyd.
I believe and am assured that I will never deliberately go to Buffalo.
I believe that Ken Caminiti was the most tragic story of MLB in the 90’s.
I believe in the Astrodome.
I believe that my mom would’ve crashed the minivan when we cruised Westheimer waving a broom out the window after the Rockets swept the Magic had that guy really tried to grab our broom.
I believe I will go to an MLS game this year. And not when Beckham is in town.
I believe that Albert Pujols, Walt Weiss, Jeff Hostetler, Shawn Kemp, and the 1986 Mets may all burn in hell.
I believe that I will see another Houston championship in my lifetime, maybe even in a sport that I really care about.